Spring Break: Notes on a Vacation and the Effects and Ramifications of its Aftermath on Academic Experience

I feel exactly the same way about Spring break- with some notable exceptions. As soon as I got home the weekend before last, I was ready to just relax and enjoy a week off from school. After about a few days, though, I was pretty bored. It was really awesome to see my high school friends (some of them, at least), and to watch our H.S. basketball team win the State Championship, but I kinda wished that I was off on some exciting trip like the stereotypical college Spring Break adventure. But I guess I didn't necessarily want to get drunk on a beach and play volleyball with a bunch of random tanned and completely air-headed girls in bikinis. So when I found out my friend at the University of Montana's mom and sister were heading out to Montana to visit her on Wednesday, I thought it would be fun to bum along for the ride. So I rode along for the 15 hour drive and spent a few days out in Montana with a couple of my high school friends- it was pretty amazing.

But now I am back at Luther- school is starting up again and I think I already feel a little spring fever coming on. I was in Philosophy today looking out the window and started to feel a pull to just go outside and... I dunno... do something. But I stayed in class, of course- if I give way to the feeling now I will have absolutely no hope once the weather warms up significantly and the trees bloom. Do trees bloom? Or is that just flowers? When the trees leaf. Well anyways, we only have a quarter left of school- 7 weeks about, and I have the feeling that April will just fly by. I think time has a winter, too, and it corresponds with the seasonal winter- when the weather gets cold and things start to die, to close up and hibernate, time slows down and begins to just slumber its way through the winter. Then spring comes and after time has stretched a bit and shaken off the last snow, it begins again to run, and then fly through summer.

My dad is coming next weekend to visit, and I'm going to send some stuff home with him so that I can get rid of all the clutter in my room. When I look at all my stuff that I have, I wonder how in the world I accumulated it all in just a short year. Didn't I come with just a van load to Luther? It feels now like I would need to call Rent-a-Van or whatever that thing is just to make it all in one trip. Here's some good advice: every time you go home over any break, always vow to bring more stuff home that you don't need then stuff to bring back that you think you might want. Otherwise, at the end of the year you will realize the only way your clothes all fit in your dressers and wardrobe is if you have a full load in your laundry basket.

Tomorrow my Fitness and Welness class starts. 8 a.m... I haven't woken up that early all semester. I'm rather worried my body will even accept my alarm going off- maybe I'll just subconsciously reject any noise I hear before 10 o'clock. I feel spoiled though. People get up at 7 or 6 or 5 or earlier every day and I am complaining about waking up at 7:55 to throw on a pair of shorts and run down to a class about how to work out.

Take it easy,

Danny

Someone to Eat Apples With...

How about someone to take a walk with on a bright spring morning?

***

Today in Chips (the student newspaper) I read a story about the graduation commencement ceremonies and realized that we only have a quarter left of school. When I look back at the beginning of the year and the uncertainty I felt trying to meet friends, dealing with a college workload, adjusting to a whole new way of life in a new setting, I realize that I have come a long ways. But it really doesn't feel like it took that long to get here. Which makes me wonder what life will be like, what I'll be like in only another three-quarters of a year, which will be... next year at Christmas break? Well, what I mean to say is, I've changed a lot, and will continue to change. But that doesn't bother me too much. I'm always me as long as my self-perception continues to be a present thing, and not a past thing. Some people get caught up in defining themselves by what they've done, by what they were, and that just makes change so hard.

Yesterday felt like a genuine spring day. I took my bike and rode down to the Depot, but didn't find any cool clothes to get; instead, I bought a couple books of poetry and two novels. After that I biked to the Co-op and bought a root beer and journaled for a bit. I was about to leave when I decided I really wanted to get some Blue Sky tea and chocolate-covered blueberries, so I stocked up on those and am now munchin' away. I think today I'll set up the slack line and thoroughly avoid doing my Paideia research paper. I'm writing about the Communist revolution in China and how it affected the family, and it's actually been quite interesting, but a guy can take only so much academia on a beautiful spring day.

I really agree with Calvin in the comic strip above. It's so damn hard to find good friends. Seems like there a lots of people that will spend their time with you, but when it comes down to it, they don't much care about you. But that's life, isn't it? You spend the majority of your time doing things you don't really want to do with people you don't really care to be with, just to have a few moments where you can let go of all that and do something for yourself. It doesn't make sense to me why we go through this long process of education, plunge ourselves into a career, and when our bodies are beginning to go, we stop it all and give ourselves some freedom to do what we want in life. It seems so obvious to me that we work for society, not that society works for us. We are slaves to a system that we created, and we don't know how to get out of it.

I know a guy here at Luther that's taking a year off next year and going to travel a bit, working on organic farms in New Zealand, Nepal, and one other place I can't remember. I envy him. I think I'll maybe do the same thing, if I ever get the courage to deviate from societal and parental expectations. For now, it's springtime and I want to go for a walk.

Take it easy,

Danny

Wise Words from 50 Cent

It's raining today, but not heavily. I actually really enjoy the rain, and have never understood why people are so against it all the time. That old nursery rhyme about rain going away and coming again another day doesn't make sense to me; rain is both good for playing and good for listening to while inside. The other day it was raining pretty heavily here and I sat in my room with the window open, some quiet music on, a cup of hot chocolate, and just sat on my couch and read a really good book (a Douglas Adams, actually). But I guess my enjoyment of the rain would be much diminished if it came more often. I'll quote one of my favorite philosophers on this one: "Joy wouldn't feel so good if it wasn't for pain" - 50 cent. Which is actually quite deep, when you think about it; it's almost Freudian. The greatest pleasures in life come from the release from pain and tension, and if we were in a continual state of pleasure, we would be both exhausted and continually jaded. We can only make distinctions about quality in their contrast to other qualities, so it makes sense to say that if we only felt joy (or it always rained), we would not be conscious of the pleasure we would be feeling.

Well other than that philosophical digression, my life has been rather predictable lately. I've been doing a lot of research for my Paideia paper, reading and writing for my Philosophy class, and studying for Bible and Politics. I declared my major last night as Philosophy, and am feeling pretty content about that, although I'm fairly sure that my feelings on that regard will fluctuate pretty regularly within the next few years. Especially when the prospect of getting a job rears its ugly head and I have to think about the 'real world.' I think after college I'm just going to buy a motorcycle and drive to South America. That should be pretty philosophical; I could really utilize my major. How happy my mother would be.

So my room is basically the hang-out room for all of my roommate and my friends. It's been that way since the beginning of the year because we have a couch, a tv, and the all-important N64. That was pretty fun for a while, but lately it's just been rather tiring. I get home from studying in the library, practicing tuba, whatever, and there are always a bunch of guys in there. And inevitably, it will smell like a bunch of guys, which is certainly not pleasant, and it will be hot and stuffy. And sometimes they'll be watching a movie so I can't really just relax. There's no place to sit and all I want is to have a clean room with space to sit and relax. Tip to incoming freshman, wherever you may be: consider carefully whether or not you want people in your room all the time. It can be just as fun to walk down the hall to hang out, and come back to your own room when you want privacy.

Only a few weeks till spring break- it will be a tough few weeks, though. Wish me luck.

Take it easy,

Danny

Food, Words, and General Epicurean Digression

I hate it when things are exactly where they are "supposed" to be. I would never find anything that way.

***

I'm at a complete loss as to what to write about; I could tell you all about how I went home for the weekend, and how that was pretty awesome, or about how I am way behind on my Paideia research and am going to be spending the whole night in the library, but I think that that would be really boring to read about. A picture of life at Luther right now? Waking up, finishing homework I really didn't want to do the night before, going to class, eating, going to more class, coming back, doing homework, eating, and then perhaps some hanging out with friends. Aha! I can tell you all about the caf, one of the things at Luther that provides a subtle yet powerful relief. For me, at least.

Whereas once in my life I saw eating as a task I had to get done before moving on to something else, in college my perspective has significantly shifted. Reversed, almost. This is something that a lot of college students experience, I think. Let's call it the College Caf Phenomenon (and yes, we call our cafeteria a caf, not a cafe. I've gotten flack at home for this. Is it a midwest college thing?). So the CCP is when going to eat becomes something you greatly look forward to--a refreshing refuge from studying and pretty much just a great place to hang out. It may be different at colleges that have A La Carte menu-ing, but being at a place where you can just sit and talk and have at your disposal more food and more variety of food than you could possibly exhaust is a pleasure that keeps me going through long classes.

Plus, caf oranges have been awe-mazing lately. And I like oranges. However, our room is beginning to smell like rotting fruit because I am too lazy to put out the trash.

Tonight I'm gonna go to the Philosophy Society meeting and philosophize it up. I am rather nervous, though, because my conversations in philosophy have hitherto been with very close friends, and have been really fun. I'm worried that this will be an awkward hit and miss discussion dominated by one or two philosophy majors puffed up with their extensive knowledge of codefied philosophy. We'll see, though. I don't want to be too pessimistic. It's pretty cool that a small liberal arts school in the midwest even has a Philosophy Society and that perhaps, I don't know yet, but perhaps has some students that question the assumptions of our societal ideology. I'd love to find someone with whom I could inveigh, invect, and just generally rant.

Weather is warming up by infinitesmal degress, but spring is definitely approaching. Get excited.

Take it easy,

Danny

February 22, 2009

Do you ever get the weird feeling that you aren't really where you are? That you aren't really in the place you are, with the people you're with, or the things that are happening around you aren't really happening to you? And it's not really as if anything tragic is happening. It's just that you could never have ever pictured yourself in the situation you're in. It's a weird feeling. It makes you feel like you have no essential, concrete self, that you are kind of a floating spectre just passing by and observing what's going on around you. I was in Minneapolis this weekend, sitting in a hotel room late at night with some guys from Grinnell College, and I got that feeling. I felt overwhelmingly lost, but not bad lost. Just floating.

Other than that one weird feeling, which I thoroughly enjoyed (if for nothing other than the sake of new experience), the Journalism conference was pretty normal. Lots of good speakers, and some good chill times just hanging out with the other journalists at Luther. The conference made me realize that I really don't know what I want to major in or do with my life. I think I'll major in life. That should be broad enough to cover most things I might wanna do after graduation. We did go out dancing at a club last night though. There are some pretty awesome aspects to living in Decorah, but sometimes a big city offers a level of excitement found nowhere else.

One thing I very much like about Luther thus far: very few people I've met are judgmental. Most everybody is open to understanding and learning about different lifestyle choices, so that's been pretty awesome. I've noticed that you can do about anything you like, and nobody will look down on you (for the most part- I mean, there are still a lot of people happily mired in their exclusionary understanding of life). But you know what, who cares? Most people on campus are chill, and I like it that way. My views on life have been changing a whole lot since college started; I sincerely hope that most people allow themselves to question everything they've been taught about life, because when you question it, whether you come back to it or change, you have a deeper understanding of why you believe what you believe.

I've got another week ahead of me with classes and homework and all that. I don't think I've got anything exciting planned, but that's okay. A day is a day is a day. Our Paideia research unit is just getting started, and the exciting part is over (choosing a topic). But what's pretty cool is that every freshman on campus is doing this. Misery loves company :)

Take it easy,

Danny

Orbit Trajectories and Life

New semester.

***

Tonight is the Jon McLaughlin concert, and I'm pretty excited to go. I mean, I'm not like a huge fan of his, but it will be fun just to do something different and exciting for a change. I've been swamped lately with homework (most of which I've actually done), and in need of a little break. However, I must say that some of my reading has been really interesting. In Philosophy we are talking about Plato and Socrates, and I've been getting really into it. My prof is super engaging and into the material, so I think that I'm catching the bug. Throughout most of the class I'm scribbling down notes on what she's saying and adding my comments about the philosophy to remember later.

Next weekend I'm headed to Minneapolis for a journalism convention, and I'm very excited for it. It should be really interesting, because they have a lot of great speakers and conferences (plus the Star Tribune just went bankrupt, so I wonder if they will talk about that at all, the conference being in Minneapolis and all). Somewhat, though, I'm just excited to get off campus. Luther is a great place to be, and activities planners do an awesome job of getting fun things to come to campus (the concert tonight), but Luther does have the unfortunate geographical hindrance of being in the middle of nowhere. I miss cities sometimes, and being in Minneapolis will be a pleasure. You can be both anonymous and intimately connected in a city--something that is hard to do at a small college in a small town.

Last weekend I had a prospective student stay with me, and it was a great experience. He was a really cool guy, and we got along well. I found myself explaining Luther to him from my perspective, and I realized that I actually quite like Luther. Sometimes it takes articulating your own confused thoughts to someone else to help you figure out what you really mean. I started writing in a journal a few months ago, and that's helped me so much to figure out my feelings towards some really confusing parts of my life. Our minds are so cluttered at college, and in our hectic society in general, that we sometimes lose sight of the big picture. We read an article in my Comparative Politics class today about how Prince Charles just turned 60 and is still waiting to be crowned King of England after his mom, Queen Elizabeth II dies or gives up the throne to him. The article praised Charles for being an uncommon example of patience and stoicism. She made the point about our modern society, about the petty irritation we feel when we lose a few moments waiting for a computer to warm up, that we are so extremely impatient. She asked, what are we rushing our lives toward?

What are we rushing to get to? I'm surrounded by people freaking out about papers and assignments and getting a good GPA, about getting into grad school or med school, and spending all their time closeted in their rooms getting the willies trying to do everything at once. I just wish people would slow down a bit, and realize that this is the best time in our lives. We are healthy, young, and we aren't old enough to be cynical about love and life. We should all make stupid decisions, and experience life, and not worry about how this or that might affect our chances at a good job and the good life. We are all rushing towards the same, inevitable end. I just hope that when I'm on my death bed, I can say that I enjoyed life, not hurried through it.

Take it easy,

Danny

Warming Up

So second semester is in full swing now, and although I'm reeling from the cost of books, I think I'm settling into a good routine a bit. The warm weather here has been both unexpected and wonderful-it's 52 degrees out right now! In the middle of February! Sometimes I think global warming may not be that bad of a process. I mean, apart from the ecological devastation, wearing shorts and sandals in Feb. is rather nice. I'm even thinking about heading outside to set up my slackline, though the ground is so saturated with melted snow that there are small lakes forming on the library lawn. Seems like everyone here is catching the spring bug; there are droves of people out walking right now, and everyone seems to be in a happier mood. I'm just rather sad because I think that we are most likely in for a icy blow from winter to bring us back to the reality that it is February and we live in the midwest plains.

I got my J-term grades back, and am happy I put so much effort into that class. Stuff always seems so hard when you are going through it, but with a happy ending you can reconceptualize the experience and conveniently forget the long hours trudging through reading and homework. We are on the downward slope of the year, leading to spring, spring break, and eventually summer (although the ominous spectre of finals keeps reminding me that it won't all be fun and games outside in the warm weather).

I have this quote sticky-noted up on my desk:

"If you add up the college education of Steinbeck, Hemingway, & Faulkner, you get to spring break of freshman year." - Tom Wolfe

And I don't mean it to be an indictment against schooling, just a convenient reminder that schooling isn't the end all and be all of wisdom and life insight. Did Shakespeare get an English degree? True, he lived in a different time, but really, you don't need to get an degree in something to pursue a dream and be successful (whatever the hell success is). The point that I'm sort of getting at here, though, is that even though I have this quote up there to remind me that I should never dismay about having to pick a major or "career" path, it's literal implications are ever-increasing as the warm weather approaches. Every day the road is more inticing- hopefully the spring break trip I'm planning with my friends will satiate my wanderlust. We'll just have to wait and see.

Take it easy,

Danny